Back to the daily grind

I'm at work right now, and I have to be at the afterschool's club in just a couple minutes, but I thought I'd update my blog really quickly....

My mom and Kay left for home yesterday. The 1.5 weeks we had together was truly amazing though. We spent a week in Grand Canary, and I am convinced that the island is paradise on earth. Most of the time was spent at the beach, but we also made time for a jeep safari to the central region of the island, a camel trek through a small desert oasis in a mountain valley, and a boat ride to see dolphins and sea turtles. The weather was perfect--right around 80 degrees, sunny everyday, little to no humidity, and gentle sea breeze. I don't think I've ever had such a relaxed, stress free week as that. It was hard to leave!! The only annoying (yet funny) part of the trip is that I got sun poisoning! Even with sunblock of spf 50, my skin was shocked by all the sun after living in Belfast the past 8 months!

When we got back to Belfast, we had a packed 2 days. My friends Alison and Ricky took us up to the north coast of Northern Ireland to the Giant's Causeway. It was the first time I had been up there even though it's nearby, and what an amazing site it is to see! Sunday I took them to my church where they got to meet my wonderful church family, then we went to lunch at the home of the Vine Centre's director. Directly after, we took a bus to Dublin, where we spent a few hours touring around at night. We went to my favorite tourist pub, the Arlington House, where we sang along to traditional Irish songs and watched some Irish riverdancing. At 4.30am, I said goodbye to mom and Kay from the hotel room, then at 8am, I took a bus back to Belfast, and jumped back into my normal routine. Whew! I'm exhausted.

Time really goes by so fast. The 10 days we had together is already a memory. The weeks ahead hold their own adventures, and I'm excited for them to come my way.

Waiting is a hard thing to do

So it's 1.30am, and I can't sleep. My mom and older sister Kay are arriving in Belfast tomorrow afternoon!!! It's been eight months since I've seen any of my family, and right now I'm soooo excited, yet nervous at the same time! I don't know why I'm nervous since it's my family, but I am. Odd. I want them to like where I live. Like my friends here. Like where I work. Like any changes that have occured within me. I know their visit will be a truly happy one, and I'm just so anxious to show them where I've been living and working this year. I want them to be here now! The day has seemed so long, and I know the hours will drag by tomorrow until their arrival.

While they're here, we'll spend a couple days in Belfast, head off to the Canaries for a week, then spend another 2 days in Belfast before they fly home out of Dublin. I need sun and warm weather--the trip to the Canaries is vital for my health. I can't take much more rain, wind, or cold weather. I need a break from Belfast.

I wish you all a very happy Easter. I pray for the safety of all those traveling this week, and ask that you keep me and my family (especially my poor dad who'll be all alone for 2 weeks!) in your prayers as well.

Is it spring yet?

Ok, so I have become horrible at blogging. I don't even feel like posting right now, but if I don't force myself to, it'll never get done....

I stumbled across a metaphor for life while sitting on the toilet the other day. I was thinking how the Thorndale House has improved since I first arrived. We got our ceiling re-finished after the New Year, and very recently the shower in the boys' bathroom has been fixed, after months of complaining to the landlords. While on the toilet, I was thinking about how nice it felt that those problems were solved when I started looking around my bathroom and identified some new problems--namely the paint peeling off the ceiling, and the door handle falling apart every time you go to open it. Just when problems are solved and things seem to be going right, something else always goes wrong.

That's how I feel at this moment. Things at the church seem to be going great, then BAM, I find out that one of the youth fellowship kids stole £20 from my wallet. Things at the Vine seem to be getting better now that we have an afterschools club coordinator and our centre director is back, then BAM, one of the management staff is asked to resign. Why can't things be perfect for more than a few days at a time? I guess that's the way life works.

While it may seem that I've grown a bit pessimistic or cynical during my time here in Belfast, I assure you that I'm the same old Sandra, just with eyes opened wider to the world around me.

So where do I go from here? While most of you reading this should know my plans for next year via the wonders of facebook, myspace, or by word of mouth, I'll be spending the next five years of my life in Louisville, Kentucky. I'll be doing a dual degree program getting my Master of Divinity through Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary and my Juris Doctor (law degree) from University of Louisville Brandeis School of Law. The great news is that I got a huge scholarship from the seminary that will basically cover all my tuition, and I got a smaller scholarship to the law school which will also help a lot. I get the question "what are you going to do with that?" from a lot of people. The answer is that I'm not sure yet, and am open to go where I feel called the most. Right now, however, I'm considering either family law, and I'd also be very interested in working for the PC(USA) headquarters. Like I said though, I'm up for anything...I have at least five years to decide, right? I am truly thankful and excited for the opportunities that lay ahead of me.

All that being said, I'm trying hard to concentrate on the here and now to make the most of the time I have left in Belfast, but that is easier said than done........

Sorry for the delay!

Wow, so it's been quite a long time since I last blogged. I guess I need to fill you in on my life for the past 2.5 months...

December: My first Christmas away from home was the best it could have been. While I missed my family and the traditions we share each holiday season, I was surrounded by joy and love from the friends I've made here. So many people gave me cards and gifts, and being so far from home made each token of friendship that much more meaningful. I also had some friends visit during the holidays, and it was wonderful being able to eat Christmas dinner with familiar faces around the table. The day after Christmas, my friends and I embarked on a 2 week excursion around Europe. We went to Dublin, Prague, Rome, London and Paris. Traveling was wonderful, but I was happy to return to Belfast. I think being happy to return speaks to my feeling of home in this once very foreign city.

January: After my friends left, it was back to the daily grind of my life as a YAV. I found January to be a very difficult month overall. Many times, I was overcome by feelings of extreme loneliness and a longing to be home. I was told by my site coordinator, Doug, that it was very normal to be feeling this way. After the hype of the holidays, the calm that follows can be unnerving.

February: Just when I thought January would never end, February finally came (and now it's gone!) The days grow visably longer (in November, the sun started setting at 3:30pm!!), and the extra sunshine each day continues to fill my soul with hope for spring. Highlight of the month: YAV retreat to Donegal. If you haven't seen my pictures yet, please take a look and see the magical place we went to. The whole trip, I was struck with awe at the beauty of God's creation. (Photos are in the Feb 06 album).

Right now, I've hit another rough patch on the road. Just when I was starting to truly feel encouraged about the youth at the church, several events have happened to bring about feelings of discouragement. Without going into much detail, there has been a suicide attempt, signs of alcohol abuse, and dangerous relationships that have been made--all by girls who are 14-15 in age. It is hard to act as a mentor or spiritual guide in times such as this that try my own faith. It is easy to say that God is struggling alongside these youth and crying for them. I do believe this in my heart, but at the same time, I am angry with God. These youth have already led very difficult lives....why can't they just get a break?

All I can ask right now is for your prayers. Prayers for God to give me patience and strength as I continue to build relationships with these youth, but more importantly, prayers for the youth--that they find God amidst their struggles and allow room for God's grace to shape and transform their lives.

Christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat...

(But unlike you non-veggies out there, I wouldn't eat those poor birds, I'd make them my friends and set them free. I'll save the plight of animals for another post though...)

Anywho....this post is about Christmas!!! I have been celebrating Christmas for the past three weeks. It all began with a trip with the senior citizens to Santa's Cottage, which, contrary to popular belief, is located in Newry, Northern Ireland, not the North Pole, and the festivities keep coming! Today, I had two celebrations. The mums and toddlers group had their Christmas party in the morning, and it was wonderful. Babies really are amusing. Trying to play pass the parcel and musical chairs proved to be quite difficult with the one and two year olds who found more interest playing with the lint off the floor. Best part of the day: Santa came to visit, and upon his entrance, one of the wee girls screamed, ran to the corner and burst out in tears. She and half of the other toddlers refused to get their picture taken with Santa, whom they apparently found very frightening. I'm sure the trauma they faced has already been forgotten, but the humour they brought to my holiday season will be remembered for a long time. My second holiday celebration was an afternoon carol service at the Vine. I played clarinet, and I was amazed at myself how much I enjoyed playing. (Especially since I received the music two hours before the service and had to transpose it and practice it within that time.)

Things I'm missing this holiday season:
-Candles in church (which are too 'Catholic' for Crumlin Rd)
-Hymns I'm familiar with (there are some similar hymns, but even those have different words from what I'm used to)
-Snow
-My family

Some sorrows...

In this Advent season, I have much to be joyful about...too much, in fact, that I don't think I could list all my blessings. Instead, I'd like to share some of my sorrows because they are few, but need prayer.

1) Some of the children from the Vine Afterschool's Club have taken a permanent leave from the program since funding has been cut and fees have been instituted. I miss their funny comments and beautiful smiles that literally filled my heart with joy. I pray that they are able to find new safe spaces to socialize with other children now that the Vine is longer able to be that place for them.

2) Mary, the cook I work with for the senior citizens' lunch club, will no longer hold that position after Christmas. She has acted like a mother to me always making sure that I am well-fed and that I'm not working too hard. While I will still be able to see her since she will be teaching cooking classes at the Vine, I am sad that I won't be working with her directly. I also pray that they are able to find a replacement cook who can put as much love into the food as she did.

3) Today I found out that Jean, a woman who comes to the lunch club and is also a member of Crumlin Pres, has cancer. She was first diagnosed with cancer in her liver and back a fews years ago and has underwent chemotherepy and radiation therepy. Yesterday, however, she found out that the cancer in her back is still present, and that it is now spreading to her kidneys. When I heard that news, tears welled up in my eyes. I don't know Jean very well, but through the contact I've had with her, I know that she is a truly kind woman. At the lunch clubs, she is always the first to help me clean up--something no other senior does, and something I don't expect anyone to do since it is my responsibility. She is always one of the first to greet me and always makes my presence feel welcome and appreciated. I know that God is watching over her, and I pray that the coming treatments will be successful and cause as little pain and discomfort as possible.

I'm dreaming of a white Thanksgiving

What an interesting Thanksgiving this has been. I went to bed last night a little sad knowing that I would spend my first Thanksgiving away from home while my sisters and parents would be home in Toledo celebrating together. It also made me sad knowing that I had to work the the next day from 11am until 9 or 10pm. When I woke up this morning, however, I never would have imagined that I would be surprised with this nasty thing called food poisoning. Yes. How ironic that on a day of feasting I would suffer from an illness that causes nausea upon the mere thought of food.

My day, however, did make positive progress. I slept most of the precious few daylight hours away, but when I awoke, I felt much better--to the point where I had an appetite, although the fear of eating was still there. As the evening wore on, however, I felt stronger and I was able to have a solid dinner.

The best part of the day: 10pm. Snow. Yes my friends, it is snowing in Belfast, and not just fluffy rain, I mean excellent packing snow. Chris, Kirk and I took advantage of the weather, and ran around outside throwing snowballs at the wee kiddos that live on our street. After a quick hot chocolate break, the boys are at it again, only this time they are throwing snowballs out of the third story window. Unfair advantage over the little lads? Yes. Funny? Yes times ten.

I am so thankful for my year here in Belfast. I'm especially thankful for the friends I have made and the memories we continue to create together. My friends here have become my surrogate family, and I am thankful to God that I have them this holiday season.

(If you're wondering, I will have a proper Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday evening with all the YAVs at our site coordinator Doug's house:)